Going to get a manicure is one of those things you always need to do, but never really get around to doing.

At least for me that is.

I was planning on getting one for a couple of weeks.

Then I read this article:

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/05/10/nyregion/at-nail-salons-in-nyc-manicurists-are-underpaid-and-unprotected.html?smid=fb-share&_r=1

(If you can’t, or haven’t or don’t have the energy to read that article right now, it’s about how terribly manicurists are treated in nail salons in NYC and other big cities. It broke my heart. It’ll probably break yours too)

So, after reading that, there was no way I would take myself to go sit and relax while someone painted my nails.

So I went and bought some nail polish and did the whole thing at home.

Although it’s a totally different experience.

First you need to get all nice and set up. Phone in reach? Tissues? Nail Polish remover for those spills?

Then you actually have to pretend you learnt something from all those manicures you got. So you do your fancy work, spreading and smoothing out the nail polish.

Now you have your first coat on. It’s terrible, but the second coat will fix it. Typing out this post will definitely ruin it, but oh well.

But now you have to wait for it to dry. Somehow, it takes about an hour longer than it does in the salon. So you have to find some ways to distract yourself from how very long that will take.

Here are some of my ideas:

1. Watch every youtube video you have ever heard mentioned

2. Stare at your nails and find all the mistakes

3. Think about folding laundry and then realize wet nails + clean clothes is pretty much a disaster.

4. Read old text conversations with people you forgot you ever spoke to

5. Plan the next ten years of your life

6. Do some online shoe shopping

7. Wave your hands in the air in an attempt to hurry the process (it doesn’t work, and it only gets your hair stuck in the still-somehow-wet-nail-polish)

8.  Do some jumping jacks. Nothing like taking the opportunity to get fit.

9.  Wonder at your color choice

10. Question your purpose in this world

Now! Check if they’re dry.

No?

Give it another year or two. You’ll probably be safe with the second coat by then.